The devil side of her. Not really full with all the hate and hatred but it does not reflect the real her. Neither that cruel, nor that nice.
She loves helping others and not the rude kind of person. She is always willing to do anything for her friends or anyone no matter how many times she had been betrayed. She is the type who hates talking behind others back. That is why some of her friends feel uncomfortable with her because she always shout her thought loud. She won’t hurt those who do nothing to her. She won’t say harsh words either, she seriously won’t.
But sometimes, she feel like want to hurt those who hurt her. Showing no sympathy to them, she will just say anything she wanted to without concerning his or her feeling. That is not the real she.
But later, she will text him or her back, and say sorry. If and only if the good side of her had returned. Just like she did yesterday, ‘dengan akal yang waras, I’m sorry.’.
Do you believe in splits personality? I do. Fullstop.
Just like Hellioz. He don’t really have splits personality. But I believe that he is such a good guy out there. No matter how rude he is anywhere you can see him with the name Hellioz. No matter how harsh the words he used in all his writing. I will always and always think that he is a very good guy. He enjoyed of being one named Hellioz, saying anything he wanted to say. Believing what he believes, doing anything he wanted to do with the sake of the name Hellioz as the real world won’t allow him to.
~Out of idea of who is Hellioz? You might be someone really good-hearted.
Anyway, the devil side of her is actually showing how weak she is. She lost to the feeling of hate and hatred and unable to forgive the prettyfucking bad memories she had. She tries to live the hatred to make the one who hurt her feel hurt as much as she does. She wants to show that a good girl gone bad, from a good person he knew since the beginning to a person with no heart. “I’m heartless you see..”, that is all she wanted him to know.
~I’m opening up my heart with honesty, letting go all the hate and hatred. Hate is burning inside of me, because of you. Because of you, I turned this way. I try to get rid of it, but everytime I tried to, you keep hurting me back again, and the hate would come again and fill the empty spaces you left inside.
Why is that? cz she is all frustrated. She gave her best to the very best. But still, she had been hurt and betrayed. Love is stupid, stupid is love. Friendship is heaven, but a ‘best’ friend is damn sickening.
It took weeks to stand again, months to forgive, and forever to forget..
~The devil side of her said, “There’s nothing I could say to you, nothing I could ever do, to make you see how much you meant to me. But all I can say is, for now, I do enjoy hurting you to the fullest.. cz the flower of hate grew well with you once showered on it..”.
p/s : it is all from the diary of the stars. have you read the book?
p/s ii : kenapa semua jeles dgn bf maCy di entry bawah?? ;p. and err, entry jiwang ditangguh, takde feeling ;D